As a child, navigating the world as the oldest in my family, I always felt lost in the wilderness.

I was a wandering little person, who would occasionally get guidance from the adults in the room. Although, it was all opinionated guidance, based on what worked for that person, or a system that was previously established.

My individuality wasn’t really considered. Especially in school. So, I remained in a state of feeling lost, wandering in a vast and darkened wilderness.

As I grew, I noticed that people, the so-called adults, were all essentially children feeling lost in the wilderness of the world.

The older I became, the clearer I saw the aching, wandering child that lives lost in all of us.

Somehow, we were expected to take all the complexities of life that were thrown at us and carry that weight unfazed. This eventually caught up to us.

Or perhaps we, on our own, we over-complicated things because we were scared, anxious, confused and didn’t know how to sift through that which was been repeatedly thrown at us.

We may be grown, but our young hearts and young minds remain lost, disconnected from our beings and authentic nature.

We were expected, at an early age, to take on one responsibility followed by another without time to connect to our truth or process any of it. As we were just finding our feet and figuring out how to balance ourselves, as well as plant our feet on the ground. The world asked us to hold philosophies, opinions, to understand politics and religions, navigate family systems, and recite mathematical equations. We were asked to pick sides, theories, and modes of operation before we ever felt solid and sturdy in our own beings.

Therefore, we remain in the wilderness.

Though as we grew, we were clever, cunning, and obedient. We did as we were told. We did as we observed was pleasing to those around us. We chose theories, perspectives, and formed opinions. We created a facade and wore a mask that fooled the world (and ourselves) into believing that we were fully formed, competent, and functional members of society.

Unfortunately, this only pushed us farther into the wilderness, out in the dark feeling alone. We became tragically disconnected from ourselves.

Our souls remain aimless and our world is stuck paying for all of it. The world is too vast and too far gone in its old systems to unlearn all that does not serve humanity.

It is up to the citizens of the world to heal. We must reconnect to and embrace our individuality. It is up to us to unlearn all that does not serve our individuality.

We may always feel scared and vulnerable.

Feel it all.

Stay present in the process of the existence of your healing journey. For you are walking out of the wilderness.

Keep walking.

Each step awakens your heart, frees your mind, and directs your soul.

You become more alive in your true essence the longer you walk this illuminated path.

This is why we are here.

Keep walking. The world will adjust.

When I was younger, the idea of putting down roots made sense. It seemed logical and simple.

Now after many years of moving from one job to the next, from one house to room to house and to room. I’m not sure how to put down roots.

There are roots in me that want to be planted. Due to previous circumstances my roots have been up in the air and out of the ground. This has been the case for a long while.

Roots are meant to be planted, grounded. It is hard to tell if the issue is mine or something outside that prevents me from planting and grounding my roots. It’s hard to know the source of the issue when not much has been grounded for a while.

If there is a Higher Power, I ask that She put on Her gardening attire and plant me where I’m needed.

Dear Great Gardener,

Please allow me to put down roots. Only you know the best place for me to grow and thrive. My roots are thirsty and tired. They are ready to be grounded and soak up all the rich soil that they are meant to be in. Plant me where I’m needed. Plant me where I can thrive among a garden of sprouting colors and lovely skies.

Sincerely yours,

One little sapling among many

Life moves forward but it happens in ways that one could never anticipate.

Your emotions will be greatly tested.

Can you withstand it?

Everything you thought you were and everything you thought you wanted will be pushed, poked, and prodded as you stumble down the uneven path.

The path will not smooth itself out as the journey continues. There will always be jagged edges, a few stones out of place and bumpy unsettled bricks or cobblestones.

Make sure you have a solid pair of shoes. More importantly make sure your mind and heart stay open.

As you are tested down this path and by the surrounding wilderness be sure to find your resilience, as you learn to embrace your needs, letting go of that which you thought you wanted.

If you don’t stay open to this then one swift trip, or loss of all emotion and life will feel grueling and unbearable.

So, you really don’t have a choice but to drop all you ever wanted and hold on for the ride.

Be sure your shoes are on tight, and your head and heart stay upright. Don’t give life a chance to say, “checkmate”. Embrace the adventure instead.

Trying to solve the outside circumstances all at once distracts from the dream one may feel led to pursue.

Trying to stay on a linear path, when the road that unfolds is full of twists and turns, distracts from working towards the dream one may feel led to pursue.

Investing all energy and focus into controlling what is happening on the outside, before doing the work that feels most important leaves the soul in a constant state of dissatisfaction and depleted from living an authentic existence.

What makes a satisfying life?

Is it your address, the job you hold for a certain number of years, or a group of people established in one place?

What if that’s not it?

Can you find your peace without those things?

Can life be more than a set address, or the job that helps you pay the bills?

Can you be at peace in your own skin?

Can you find peace and joy in the work that won’t pay your bills?

Your life is not about where you live, the day job you have, or your social life.

Settling down in a permanent location will not solve an unsettled heart.

Trying to settle everything around you before you settle down to do the work that your heart most wants to pursue, will keep you distracted, and unsatisfied.

Life will always have things that come up. There will always be something that will distract from peace and remove you from the work that feels most important.

Life must be about finding peace in yourself and dedicating yourself to that which you enjoy most. From this focus, you will find satisfaction that lasts and you’ll benefit the world.

Sometimes you must get out of your head to let what the heart has to say flow out.

Sometimes you have to tell the head to take a back seat and let the heart drive.

Sometimes the heart is needed much more than the head.

Sometimes deeper listening can happen much more from the heart than the head.

Let the heart guide your work, your interactions, your day.