The Journey of Becoming

I’m not the person I want to be.

I have not been in very many spaces where I have felt safe and fulfilled enough to let myself expand. I’ve gained skills through hard work and training, but still, I am not in a space where my soul feels able to grow in its natural talents.

To use my talents would allow my soul the chance to exhale unapologetically and openly bring the most amount of good I can give to the world, as it will not only contribute to the cause of corporate/societal productivity but for a deeper cause.

To use my talents would allow me to serve the world for the betterment of the human race, in the spirit of uplifting society and the hearts of humanity. By doing this work, the work that comes most naturally to me and that which I love the most, I will be able to bring the best version of myself to the world.

I dream of a moment in time where this may be possible. I dream of this connected life where my soul finally aligns with my heart, mind and body. But for now, I must work.

Growth has been inevitable, but my talents only get exercised in private. My soul stays tucked away. My body remains in survival mode while my heart and mind continue their lifelong battle with each other and their exhaustive quest for inner peace.

The blank page offers a gentle refuge for some much-needed rest from these uncomfortable environments and from the inner turmoil of this ongoing crusade.

Here is where my soul quietly exhales. Quietly, for now.

For now, she must use the blank page in private, allowing her creative talents to flourish only in secret, until the world opens up and is ready for her creative gifts. And perhaps she herself is not quite ready to believe in her own brilliance.

So, what needs to change before her soul can emerge, the environment or herself? Two things can be true at once. The environment may not be working for her, and she may have some growing to do too.

I’m not the person I want to be, yet. Nor am I living a life where my soul feels connected and where it can thrive, yet. This is all part of the building process on the journey of becoming.

I am becoming. I look forward to building a life that is aligned and connected with who I am becoming.