The process of weeding is tedious, backbreaking, and challenging work. In a field or a garden, if we want our crops and flowers to grow we must do the work of weeding first. When we have cleared enough weeds then there is room for the crops to grow. Flowers get the chance to bloom and all that are planted can gain better access to the right nutrients that will allow the plants to reach their full potential.
Imagine a flower in full bloom. How effortlessly it basks in the sun. The lovely flower smiles at the sun with its outstretched petals and the sun smiles back. There’s a lovely flow and communication happening in nature during these full bloom moments. Everything seems to be so easy and beautiful. However, it did not start this way. We did not see all the work and effort the little flower went through to grow. We did not see the full process of evolution the flower had to endure. This is true for people too.
Most of the time, especially on social media, we see the final product. We see someone beaming with joy during a vacation, or a happy new family. It is easy to congratulate someone when we see these pictures. It is easy and uplifting to witness joy. But there’s a lot we don’t know and we did not witness. Someone may be enjoying their vacation, but we did not see them months before when they were tirelessly working a forty hour week at the office and being a full-time caretaker to their grandmother. We did not see the grief they went through when they witnessed their grandmother’s passing and the challenge they had to endure as they did all the work of organizing their grandmother’s assets. And the new family may be smiling now, but we did not see them months before when the mother was struggling to get pregnant. We did not see the many tears she cried when miscarriage would occur, and we did not see the hard mix of emotions the father was going through as he supported his wife full-time during the final stages of her pregnancy.
Those hard moments in life require a great deal of weeding. Unfortunately the weeding we must do is a very intimate process because it happens inside us. So we must do our weeding work as individuals. Spouses, friends, and kind neighbors can help along the way, but the individual is the only one that can really do the weeding for themselves. Although, it is a challenge, this process can also be empowering.
The person who took care of her grandmother, witnessed her passing and then took care of her assets had some weeding she was doing. She was not only weeding through the overwhelm and challenge of figuring out what to do with all her grandmother’s things, how to sell her house, and honor her grandmother’s will, but she also had to work through the many emotions that came with that. She had to weed through many days of grief and heartache. She had to find the resilience to get out of bed and tackle her to-do list. She had to make meals for herself and continue working at the office to support herself. That is necessary weeding.
The couple trying to have a family had some weeding to do. Not only were they working through the challenge of miscarriage and trying to have a child, but they were sifting through various doubts. The mother wondered after each miscarriage if she was supposed to me a mother. She grappled with a feeling of failure and despair. Perhaps there were days she wanted to give up. The father was weeding through his wife’s emotions while also going through his own. He wondered if they do have a child will he be a good father. He wondered will he be a good husband and how he could be a good husband now. He worried about how he grew up and felt nervous that his child might grow up with similar challenges, if he could not keep his fear in check. While it is a grueling process, it is necessary weeding.
Weeds will continue to grow inside us and around us if we do not pluck them. When we do our weeding work the light on the other side is so much brighter. Beautiful things happen when we decide to pluck a few weeds. Some weeds are harder to clear. They have strong roots inside us. They have made a home for themselves. If we are willing to make a mess and get dirt under our fingernails then we can get to the root of the weed. We can clear the weeds and the clearing will prove to be effective. Once enough weeds have been removed we will start to witness the budding of growth and healing. Oh, what a beautiful thing that will be!
And if you want this gorgeous growth and healing to blossom, then we must choose to pluck weeds everyday. This promise will lend itself to the blossoming of a beautiful garden. Oh, what a lovely garden it will be!